Week Eight Picks

It’s cute how baseball takes the nation by storm once every year. 

Oh, wait.  Did I say nation?  I meant Boston and most of Denver.  The rest of us don’t really care that much about what’s going on, which makes the NFL’s annual favor to MLB of not broadcasting a Sunday night game to make [...]

The Mourning After

My fantasy life, as I know it, is over.

No, I am not referring to the fantasy life in which I am king of my own island, live in a house made of Tillamook cheese, and own a dog that speaks English, Spanish, and Japanese.  Thankfully, that one still lives on.

The premature end of my fantasy [...]

Week Seven Picks

I finally had a good week picking games in Week Six.  And while the facts may make it seem like my good week was mere coincidence, I like to think of it as my genius finally taking over.
Therefore, picking games is simply no longer hard enough.  Now I’m going to tell you exactly what will [...]

Friday Night Lights: Feelings vs. Football

We are two episodes into the second season of Friday Night Lights, and there has yet to be a football game.   
In fact, there has been everything but a football game.
Drinking, partying, yelling, and childbearing are everywhere.  We’ve met characters like the Swede, Dillon’s new head coach, and a homewrecking science teacher.  There were extended scenes [...]

Fantasy Lemons

Cleo Lemon is not my friend.
Obviously, he is not my friend because he is a professional football player, and I take multiple naps every day.  We are nothing alike and probably have nothing in common, unless Lemon also happens to loooooove Christian rock.  But I highly doubt that.
Despite our differences, it is not like I [...]

Week Six Picks

Picking games against the spread last week was a disaster.  It got worse when I realized I was not good at math and still have a hard time understanding what being “plus-four” means. 
That said, the weekly picks are going back to a straight-up version.  I never did like change anyway.There is a good variety [...]

Fantasy Perfection

With the Patriots, Colts, and Cowboys each running their records to a perfect 5-0, the talk around the league has been whether or not any of them can finish with a perfect record.
Meanwhile, a similarly perfect, similarly unstoppable group is still flying under the radar: my fantasy team.
With a win last week over my league’s [...]

Case of the Mondays…

Cowboys vs. Bills. The easiest job for Trent Edwards so far has probably been making fans forget J.P. Losman.  In fact, Bills fans often forgot about Losman between series while he was still playing.  Edwards looked good in a win over the Jets last week, but he only had to score 17 points to get [...]

WebMD Injury Report Week Five

Joey Porter, Miami Dolphins
Symptoms:  Insignificant, weak, upsetting
WebMD diagnosis:  Heartburn
About heartburn:  Also known as GERD (gastroesophageal reflux disease), heartburn afflicts millions of Americans each day.  For some it is caused by eating the wrong thing or eating too late.  Porter’s is caused by signing with the Dolphins.  Heartburn is caused by stomach acid, which [...]

Week Five Picks

Four weeks have passed in the NFL season, and my picks have gotten progressively worse.  I started off as a world-beater, and now I’m merely mediocre.  In other words, I am the San Francisco 49ers.  

So before things get out of hand, I think it might be time for a change.  This week, I’ll be picking games [...]